If there was one thing in my young life that caused anxiety it was using the phone. I have talked about this briefly in another post but wanted to readdress it.
As a young girl that idolized my dad. I was always offering to help him out, around the house, and in his office. As a young early elementary student, I would climb a ladder 3 stories to paint a window on a barn, I would brave the elements to feed the ponies during a blizzard with only dad’s voice to lead me back to the house, he asked and I did it. I was brave and determined to do anything my dad asked until he would ask me to make a call for him.
I would get out in front of large crowds for public speaking. In fact, I loved the audience! I could see the people and read their faces and change my narrative or tone of voice to keep them engaged. I was very good at this. I was asked to MC programs at school and 4-H.
BUT – my confidence in public speaking did not cross over to the phone. This is very common for many with phone phobia. The anonymity that emails and texting give does not help you relate to the person with who you are contacting. For some phone phobia is a part of social anxiety. For me, I would say give me a stage but not a phone!
For some reason using the phone would cause me to feel anxious. I did not think anyone knew how anxious it would make me because I never let on and always came up with an excuse.
Maybe my dad knew? When he would ask that I make calls for him and get someone on the line for him, I would come up with lame excuses. He tried to prepare me for all sorts of things in life. I think he could see my struggle because of all of my excuses and the fact, I would not even call a friend back. If someone else answered the phone and it was for me I may take it. If the phone would ring I remember finding something to do so I would not have to answer it. I am sure I probably even “looked anxious”. I remember having a meltdown one day over a call he wanted me to make….
FATHER KNOWS BEST
Dad backed off from asking me to make business calls. But without knowing he did what today would be called exposure therapy. He started by just handing me the phone when he called a relative. Bit by bit he worked me up to being his “secretary” he gave me a script and I would make business calls for him. Once I realized there was nothing to FEAR, the fact that I could not see them worked to my advantage. Dad told me to be an actress and the “secretary character” was making the call not me. I would pretend I was a secretary and this mind set would lead me to excel in phone conversations. It did not happen overnight. But over the years I got to the point I would call anyone, any office…. I would call the office of a General to arrange an interview while in the Army Reserve, a State Senator to ask them to speak at an event. I helped a friend with cold calls for his business and was in the top 5% of his team.
I would say if you tend to get anxious with phone calls lookup exposure therapy. The process of facing fears is called EXPOSURE. Exposure involves gradually and repeatedly going into feared situations until you feel less anxious. Exposure is not dangerous and will not make the fear worse.
There are several links you should check out!
1.My favorite is the video – Overcoming phone phobia
2. 5 Effective Strategies to overcome phone phobia Phobia of talking on the phone is usually described as a milder form of social anxiety and a lot of even seemingly neurotypical people experience. Psychologists believe that this is due to the lack of non-verbal signs like gestures and facial expressions that the “bodiless voice” feels intimidating.
3. How to Face Your Fears – by very well mind sets up an easy-to-understand outline https
4. Struggling with a Phobia? Advice on How to Face Your Fears
PS
Have you ever heard the statement All things are possible…? It stems from the Bible. there are over 15 verses that tell us this. Here is one of the most popular Mark 10:27 – And Jesus looking upon them saith, With men it is impossible, but not with God: for with God all things are possible.
So it seems to reason that the deamonic realm is going to do everything possible t destroy your ability to believe. (Look up bible verses Bible Verses About – All Things Are Possible)
You do not want your issues to become your identity. You need to get rid of the victum mentallity and become a new person – The promise to become a new person does not mean God will change us on the outside, but it means He will change us on the inside. The Bible tells us “If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” (2 Corinthians 5:17). … This also means that God wipes out our past mistakes. Believe God’s promise to transform you to a new man a life in Christ Jesus rather than spending so much time in evalating your problems.
Fight Back Fight fear 